Renew your self-image to match who you really are?

Renew your self-image to match who you really are?

by | Feb 26, 2025 | Blog, Changing the story, Ignite your sparkle

Very early on, our brains create an image of ourselves that has its roots in our earliest life experiences. Our brain uses this self-image as a kind of roadmap to predict who we should be and how we should be in relationship to our environment, and others. This self-image directs how we move, talk, think, feel, and perceive ourselves in the world. It drives our behavior and relationships, and it shapes our model of the world.

As toddlers, we learned by trial and error what was safe to feel and express in order to receive love from our caregivers. We learned to suppress certain sensations and copy certain behaviors for fear of rejection. In other words, we learn early on who, how, and what we need to be to belong and be safe.

A self-image is a complex composition of image, movement, emotion, sensation, and perception. Depending on how it sees us in the world, it forms attentional habits that then act as a filter, a kind of glasses, distorting all our perceptions, images, emotions, thoughts, and sensations. And all those perceptions, emotions, thoughts, and sensations inform our neuro-biology about what the world inside and around us is like.

So you could say that our self-image colors our inner experience and our perception of the outside world. If this keeps repeating itself, it creates patterns in our neurobiology that in turn affect our lives, relationships, and well-being.

Suppose you have a negative self-image…This can become an endlessly repeating circle that culminates in hypervigilant attention habits that revolve around what is wrong and constantly reinforce our negative experiences. Resulting in our neuro-biology running survival programs that deplete our body systems of energy. We might not feel very well in our skin all-together which in turn reinforces our negative self-image. An endless circle…

How can you create a new self-image that matches who you really are in the heart of your being?

Our body tells our story. It’s like a history book. The way she stands, sits, moves, dances, and expresses inner movement. They are all expressions of how we are in the world and how we are in relationship with ourselves, and others. They also reveal how our nervous system has organized itself based on our self-image.

Our body also knows the way out of a negative self-image. That is out of neurobiological survival patterns rooted in negative attention habits. If we only dare to trust her and entrust us to her guidance, she will show us how to write a new story. A new story through the physical senses and how she receives the environment through them.

When we put our minds in the passenger seat and enjoy the ride of the eyes, ears, nose, tongue, and skin, we experience the world as it is. A world that is not necessarily about us. It’s neutral and it helps our brains map themselves into the here and now that isn’t colored by the attentional habits of our self-image. It gives our brain an accurate world map of the moment.

Our brain has the task of mapping out a route to the next moment that is as energy-saving, enjoyable, and pleasant as possible. This means that the brain makes a prediction and a strategy to face the future, the next moment. Our biology and body systems then use this information to do their magic. You can imagine that the uncolored objective reality of our senses provides a better roadmap for that route than the colored subjective negative world map created by the self-image.

And in time with the real-time roadmap of the senses and the updated strategies of our brain, our genius system starts to form a new self-image that is rooted in the here-and-now story of how we belong and are embedded in the greater web of life.

And then the circle starts again. Attention habits form that inform our biology which in turn informs us through how we move, feel, sense, give meaning, dream, and envision. Only this time the attention habits tell us about what is, and reflect our nature back to us by what we receive from the present world around us. And those will be messages of beauty, goodness, kindness, and ease that recalibrate our inner compass to our inner sparkle, to genuine well-being, and authenticity

And to have again an inner compass that guides us to our inner sparkle, to our north star, to the essence of who we are… That is what I wish for us all.

The power of your self-image

The power of your self-image

by | Jan 16, 2025 | Blog, Changing the story, Movement as Medicine

How do you feel? And how do you want to feel?

These are the most important questions for me when guiding someone. These questions led me to how a person experiences herself or her body and has created an image of herself. And for many women, that self-image is anything but positive, with all the misery that entails.

Our self-image is like a filter of thoughts, beliefs, and feelings through which we see ourselves, our bodies, our actions, and our environment. It has a huge impact on how we move through our lives, and what decisions we make for ourselves. It creates our signature as well as our habits.

Our self-image manifests itself in the body through the way we hold ourselves and the way we move. The more negative our self-image, the more postures we adopt that can really hurt us physically. Our self-image also reflects in the health of our body and in our outer appearance. Do you sparkle? Do you open your heart to the world or close yourself off? Do you feel heavy, rigid, or light, expansive? Our self-image guides us through life, for better and for worse.

I experienced first-hand how my self-image steered my life.
My self-image told me early on that it was not safe to be me, that I was not loved, not good enough and not worth being seen. That I should be ashamed of who I was and that I would never belong. And my way of coping with this image was by trying to be perfect in all sorts of ways and by doing that, I was actually creating more of a harmful self-image and its associated harmful habits. Do you recognise that your self-image makes you feel smaller and more scared than you actually are?

Our nervous system is very vulnerable in the early years of our lives. It absorbs energy from our caregivers and our environment. However, the brain is not yet sufficiently developed by then to understand and give words to all these stimuli. Until our 5th year of life, all life experiences, positive and negative, are experienced with the same intensity. Our nervous system at this stage explains all signals into pain or pleasure. As little ones, we are completely dependent on the love and attention of our caregivers to survive, so we will do anything to get it.

During this period, we often create the painful pieces of our self-image and all the emotional habits that stem from it. This limits us in our later life to step into our light. Our self-image has the power to hinder our nervous system from creating opportunities that put us in our power with regard to our health, our feelings, our thoughts and the way we move and act.

I know you need to change your self-image to get your sparkle back. And that this requires small actions. One step at a time. How wonderful that you can easily achieve this by starting through your body and at the level of action: namely, moving.

Movement is the language of the central nervous system.
That part of our nervous system that organises and coordinates our thoughts, feelings, actions, and movement. It receives all input through movements that take place inside and outside the body and that we experience through sensations, for example. Think of the movement of breathing, cell activity, the organs, the skin, the blood flowing through the veins, the beating of our heart, the life energy that flows through us and expresses itself through emotions, among other things, and so on.

With this information, our nervous system organises all the activities in our body. Not only our physical movement, but also our thinking, feeling, and acting. It has the ability to create endless new connections and opportunities to dance with life. And this is why, through the body and with movement, I can create lasting change for the women I coach.

May I dance you home?

 

What about your inner castle?

What about your inner castle?

by | Dec 29, 2024 | Blog, Changing the story, Ignite your sparkle

Sometimes I read a text whose symbolism completely coincides with what is going on in my inner world at that moment. At such a moment, when the words reflect this back to me, peace and clarity arise in my mind.
The text below is such a text. It comes from the inspiring book “Dark side of the light chasers’ by Debby Ford

“Imagine being a magnificent castle with long hallways and thousands of rooms. Every room in the castle is perfect and possesses a special gift. Each room represents a different aspect of yourself and is an integral part of the entire perfect castle. As a child, you explored every inch of your castle without shame or judgment. Fearlessly you searched every room for its jewels and its mystery. Lovingly you embraced every room whether it was a closet, a bedroom, bathroom, or a cellar. Each and every room was unique. Your castle was full of light, love, and wonder.
Then one day, someone came to your castle and told you that one of your rooms was imperfect, that surely it didn’t belong in your castle. They suggested that if you wanted to have a perfect castle you should close and lock the door to this room.
Since you wanted love and acceptance, you quickly closed off that room.


As time went by, more and more people came to your castle. They all gave you their opinions of the rooms, which ones they liked and which ones they didn’t. And slowly you shut one door after another. Your marvelous rooms were being closed off, taken out of the light, and put into the dark. A cycle had begun. From that time on, you closed more and more doors for all kinds of reasons. You closed doors because you were afraid, or you thought the rooms were too bold. You closed doors to rooms that were too conservative. You closed doors because other castles you saw did not have a room like yours. You closed doors because your religious leaders told you to stay away from certain rooms. You closed any door that did not fit into society’s standards or your own ideal.
The days were gone when your castle seemed endless and your future seemed exciting and bright. You no longer cared for every room with the same love and admiration. Rooms you were once proud of, you now willed to disappear. You tried to figure out ways to get rid of these rooms, but they were part of the structure of your castle.

Now that you had shut the door to whatever room you didn’t like, time went by until one day you just forgot that room altogether. At first, you didn’t realize what you were doing. It just became a habit.

With everyone giving you different messages about what a magnificent castle should look like, it became much easier to listen to them than to trust your inner voice: the one that loved your entire castle. Shutting off those rooms actually started to make you feel safe. Soon you found yourself living in just a few small rooms. You had learned how to shut off life and became comfortable doing it.¨(from the book of “Dark side of the light chasers’ by Debby Ford)


How recognizable, THIS! Many of us put away so many facets of who we are. Those facets are like rooms in the colorful castle we once were when we were born. And as more rooms in our castle are locked away and forgotten, we become more like a small studio in an apartment complex that is constantly being tweaked to look the same as all the other studios in the building and meet the aesthetic requirements of the housing corporation (read society). And we may not even remember over time that we were once a very special castle with many colorful rooms.

In Quantum Human Design (QHD) this ´tweaking ourselves to meet society´standards´, is called conditioning. A QHD map helps you see which rooms in your inner castle you have closed, and forgotten and it gives you keys to re-open and reclaim those rooms of your inner castle. It also helps you see where you let others decide about how your rooms should be. And it helps you re-attune to your inner voice of wisdom. Since living more according to my unique Human Design, I am more and more my whole castle again, and more and more of my quirky, crazy, colorful and sacred rooms are open to me again.

Last year I certified in the last level of Quantum Human Design; level 4. Studying and certifying is one thing and important. However giving as much Quantum Human Design readings is even more important to become skilled and confident in delivering others their unique Human Design roadmap. So I decided to offer free Quantum Human Design reading in the one-to-one Dance Healing retreat Reclaim your inner Freedom.

Move into Joy offers a holistic and sensory-based approach to healthy joyful being in all aspects of life. I offer transformational retreats for women seeking self-connection, self-acceptance, and expression of their authentic inner sparkle.

Are you ready to reclaim your power and life artistry? Join me for a retreat at Jardin de Luz Inner Sparkle Sanctuary, Spain

What is your story?

What is your story?

by | Dec 29, 2024 | Blog, Body Intelligence, Changing the story, Somatic Wisdom

What is your story?

And is it still the story you want to tell yourself?

The way you move tells your personal myth and shows you the hidden parts of yourself. It reveals to you the deepest beliefs and feelings that underlie the story you have come to tell yourself about yourself and the world around you.

Your way of moving tells you f.e. about the unconscious thoughts that dominate your self-image from the background. You can read your deep basic beliefs and unconscious habits, and also how you are in relationship with your body and the world around you.

The way you stand, sit, move, reach out, and turn inwards tell about (unconscious) emotional patterns. These often originated long ago and impose themselves in the way you carry yourself; your personal conditioned patterns of muscle-contraction as well as the way you talk to yourself and about yourself.

Meet yourself in movement

Over the years, I learned about the many unconscious stories I was telling myself by landing more in my body and becoming aware of how I was moving and how that made me feel.

I now recognize the stories that are well hidden in the depths trying to keep their grip. They used to control me with subtle posturing patterns that kept me small. Now I am aware of their ways and can choose whether and how to respond to them.

Your body tells your inner story

Most of these subconscious stories, that live on quietly in the background, reveal themselves in a moment of challenge. Often through a sudden sensation, or an abrupt change in your inner energy flow, that gesture you always make, or that small but all too familiar movement. And even more often through that subtle familiar but unconscious body posture that you have become accustomed to over the years.

They are those hidden stories that were written when we were very small and sometimes even long before that. And sometimes the stories live on through us, but belong to our family or ancestors.

How do your stories reveal themselves? I love to hear from you.

Over the years my practice of Feldenkrais and NIA  turned me into a curious movement and sensation detective who uses dance to unravel the inner stories that move, challenge, and touch me. I like to use the movements for my´Body Wise Soul Guide´cards and write a little message to my soul on them.

So from time to time I draw a card like this to remind myself that I am worth loving myself for who I am, that I am enough as I am, and that my needs want to be valued and honored.

Move into Joy offers a holistic and sensory-based approach to healthy joyful being in all aspects of life. I offer transformational retreats for women seeking self-connection, self-acceptance, and expression of their authentic inner sparkle.

Are you ready to reclaim your power and life artistry? Join me for a retreat at Jardin de Luz Inner Sparkle Sanctuary, Spain

What if you could have a no-regret relationship with yourself?

What if you could have a no-regret relationship with yourself?

by | Sep 3, 2024 | Blog, Changing the story, Ignite your sparkle, Somatic Wisdom

Sadness and anger are as much a part of our life as joy. And we have a choice in how we receive and respond to all the challenges life throws at us. Much of it comes down to how we label our emotions, how we perceive ourselves and the world, and how we give meaning to the words we use and receive.

Can we be genuinely open to all aspects of who we are? Can we begin to have compassion for the parts of ourselves that we have excluded from our light? Can we take a step in welcoming back our bodies and the shadow parts that live there hidden in the darkest of our cells…?

When we are able to do this, we begin to build a relationship with ourselves that is grounded in love, authenticity, respect, and living our soul potential.

It is here that words like unconditional love take on a felt meaning and a higher vibration.

It is here that we experience ourselves in a free body that can again move with grace, vitality, and sensuality.

Through a concsious and intimate relationship with our bodies, we can reconnect to our heart’s inner wisdom and healing capacity. Being in touch with our whole self helps us tap into the vast innate intelligence of our body and soul, Create a beautiful life with who you are, and what you have. This is what I call a no-regret relationship with yourself.

Become your own body whisperer and dance in your sovereignty and inner power!

Embark with me on a magical, intimate, and mindful journey through your body. Reconnect with your uniqueness and your heart’s deepest desires, move through your emotional landscapes, and get in touch with your body’s sensations and energetic vibrations.  

Move into Joy offers a holistic and sensory-based approach to healthy happy being in all aspects of life.  I offer transformational retreats for women seeking self-connection, self-acceptance, and expression of their authentic sparkle.

Are you ready to reclaim your power and life artistry? Join me for a retreat at Jardin de Luz Inner Sparkle Sanctuary, Spain

Moving out of habits of perfection

Moving out of habits of perfection

by | May 11, 2024 | Blog, Body Intelligence, Changing the story, Nervous System Health, Somatic Awareness, Somatic Wisdom

Last week during the retreat as we were exploring our senses through our animal body and dancing with its emotions of grief, anger, and pleasure, we came to speak about the habit of perfection, the hurt and wounding underneath, and how it has influenced how many of us can be so hard and demanding on ourselves, and lack the self-compassion to give loving attention and care to our bodies and sensations. As a result, we miss out on many valuable sensations, sparks of sensory wisdom, and a sense of natural time and rhythm.

Many of us live with a stressed, deprived nervous system, and chronic holding patterns in the body that cause hypersensitivity, and lack of energy, and also make us feel less animated or flatten everyday pleasurable and joyful sensations and emotions.

I believe the most important part of healing your soul is finding your way back to sensing in the here and now. Allowing your sentient animal eyes, ears, sense of smell, taste, and touch to curiously scan their natural living environment, feel its beauty and magic in every cell of your being, and receive its nourishment for your nervous system and body.

For in order to heal your system of body, mind, soul, and inner spirit and soothe the stricken animal within, your nervous system needs to connect with and map into its present sensuous environment where it can tune into the soothing ebb and flow-like greater natural movement and rhythm of the earth and cosmos.
This gradually and in small reversible steps changes your perception and your physical-emotional holding patterns and steadily guides you into your sacred essence….

I have read Marion Woodman´s ‘Addiction to Perfection’ a few times and Marian Woodman puts it beautifully. I quote Marion Woodman:

“First, I believe that femininity is taking responsibility for our bodies, so that the body becomes the tangible expression of the spirit within.
For those of us who have lived life in the head, this is a long, difficult and agonizing process, because in attempting to release our muscles, we also release the pent-up fear and rage and grief that has been buried there, probably since or before birth .
Within ourselves we find a stricken animal almost dead from starvation and mistreatment. Because it has been punished for long, it acts at first like a wild neurotic creature that hasn’t known love. But gradually it becomes our friend, and because it understands the instincts better than we, it becomes our guide to a natural, spiritual way of life.
To find the natural rhythms of our bodies, to walk, to see, to hear, to feel with renewed sensitivity and perception, is to return to our birthright which is our gift from the Goddess” Marion Woodman | ‘Addiction to Perfection’

Because the relationship with our bodies is such an important and permanent one in our lives, I feel that creating a beautiful relationship with our wise bodies is a must in order to feel alive, and able to manifest our greatest, most exquisite soul desires and dreams.

Are you seeking to connect deeper with your body and feel better in your skin?

I offer ongoing retreats to help women with

  • finding their way back to sensing themselves in the here-and-now
  • changing constricting perception habits
  • change painful physical-emotional holding patterns in the body
  • align with their sacred essence, inner wisdom, joy and sensuality
  • build a loving relationship with their wise bodies
  • create beauty with who they are and what they have

You can check out my retreats via Bookretreats.com